Mood Swings

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Easter morning (yesterday) the sun started coming up just as I was waking. I made it out the door in time to go for a beautiful run. I didn't care that it took 10 minutes to go a mile as I recovered from not only a marathon pace practice the day before, but also the Easter vigil which meant a 1:30am bed time. I might have been dragging my body along for the ride, but my spirits were high. 

Then this morning, it rained. I don't mind running in the rain, but starting to run while it is raining is mentally a bit more challenging. But I started. And the rain let up after a few miles in. I won't go so far as to say I liked it, but it gave me some sense of order.

Today is the Boston Marathon. 

Some of the runners did great and others didn't do as well as they wanted. Even the professionals. 

It made think about the scalability of running and the shared drama no matter the level or athletic ability. My disappointments are as real as the disappointment of a pro who cramps up at mile 20. Different scales, and obviously I have less at stake or invested, but the raw emotions involved can mirror each other.

I'm not sure how I can stuck on this idea I needed to qualify for Boston this time around. I think I get the sense that my athletic clock is ticking and it is going to be harder as I grow older to hit the mark. But maybe that presumption doesn't hold water the way I think it does. After all, I am fitter now at 44 than I was 2 years ago at 42. If this is the case, than waiting another 6 months makes the most sense. Then again, another 6 months nothing is guaranteed. sheesh. "Got to love the process" they say.

Still thinking through what's best. We shall see. 





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